Javier Bardem?

As Hollywood is typically awful in casting actors for roles in movies, it seems to be inclined to try to validate its poor decisions by presenting “Oscars” to the more spectacular incarnations of its will to destroy a good story by miscasting. For the role of “Anton Chigurh” the Coen brothers cast (or accepted) Javier Bardem, who plays the role much after the fashion of Boris Karloff in his classic Frankenstein role. One must assume the “Bros” had more than a little influence in this matter. The childish concept that evil-doers must look evil, or monstrous, immediately places the film on a downward tilt to the banal side of the street. Yet, this film and Bardem apparently “knocked the socks off” critics and cheerleaders in the guise of fans. How did the City of Angels descend into such a cockeyed state of affairs? Drugs?

My suggestion is that Hollywood finally pay tribute to the originals in horror: Boris Karloff, Bela Lugosi, Lon Chaney, James Arness (The Thing), et al. Hollywood, for once in your existence, do the right thing! Posthumous “Oscars” to the masters of the character type you imposed on the hired killer, “Anton Chigurh,” with subsequent “swoons & squeals” of delight from the moviemaking community and the media that covers their doings.

All rights reserved. Gobigfoot, 2008.

RAMBO: A REVIEW

RAMBO (2008)

This is a film directed by Sylvester Stalone. He also, along with Art Monterastelli, wrote the screenplay. Folks, get a good grip on your hats: He also stars in this film! Sly Stalone is a talented lad. Oh, maybe he’s a bit jowly now, but he still has a “lock” on the sullen, disagreeable personalty. In this film that can be a lifesaver (along with a highpower automatic rifle and a good knife).

There is a fairly large cast, if you count “spearholders.” Giving Mr. Stalone useful support is Julie Benz, as “Sarah,”  Graham McTavish, as “Lewis,,” and Paul Schulze, as “Michael Bennett.” There was a level of contribution just below them, wherein various characters made some verbal and, more noticeably, “action” contributions. Here the moviegoer notices Matthew Marsden, as “School Boy,” Reynaldo Gallego, as “Diaz,” Jake La Botz, as “Reese,” and such passing phenomena as Aung Theng, as the river pirate leader. The numerous extras may have been drawn from the local military, as they seemed comfortable with and rather effective as either the warlord’s troops or the “Karen Freedom Fighters.” In fact the same men may have played both roles to some extent or other. Except for uniform, the distinction becomes blurry, as they are drawn from kindred people. In this film, as a matter of fact, the warlord “shanghais” young village boys to be turned into ruthless, cruel soldiers [shades of BLOOD DIAMOND (2006)].

There is a good deal of print inserted to “clarify” the location and otherwise help the moviegoer through the jungle.

Storyline: John Rambo is making a living by capturing dangerous snakes on behalf of a Thai entrepreneur, who operates a sort of “Bull Ring” where the role of bull is played by a cobra (or other dangerous El Snako) and the matador is played by a sly Thai. Rambo is importuned by Christian missionaries to take them to a village “controlled” by the Karen people, who were being killed at genocidal levels by a certain warlord. They wanted to help these people with humanitarian aid and the message of Christ. Rambo tells them tersely to forgetaboutit. The sole female among the missionaries (naturally young, pretty, and shapely) implores Rambo’s help, after the initial rebuff to Michael Bennett. He betrays a heart not altogether dead to “sweet young things” asserting quietly an undeniably just cause, agreeing to take them up the river in his boat. This trip was not without its moment of peril. There are cuts, meanwhile, to the warlord wantonly slaughtering scads of Karen villagers, reenforcing Rambo’s warning about going there. The missionaries are let off at a certain spot and make their way to the desired village, where they begin to do much good with medicine, dental care, and biblical messages. Initially helpful, in time they, as well as the villagers, are bombarded with warlord mayhem, resulting in the usual massacre of villagers and the imprisonment of the missionaries. A representative of the Christian missionary organization that had sent the hapless group to Burma contacts the hulking, phlegmatic Rambo for help. John Rambo isn’t too interested, due to the suicidally unfavorable odds, but is informed by the missionary group’s man on location that he would not have to go alone, because he had arranged for mercenaries to liberate the captives. All Rambo needed to do was “boat” them up the river. Rambo agrees to do this. Well, war is in his blood, so–big surprise–Rambo joins the hunt. This is a good thing. The missionaries are sprung, they go on the run, and Rambo proves ammo carries a message of its own. Not everyone makes it but–hey!–war is hell. There is an epilog to this movie that is rather distinct. In it the question arises: Is this a country for violent, old men? Time will tell.

This film had more carnage in it than even a vulture might dream about as a sort of “vulpine heaven.” The film’s most striking and praiseworthy aspect is the design and execution of the fight scenes, as well as the special effects created to exploit the violent mayhem. There isn’t too much to praise, otherwise. The collected works of Sylvester Stalone, I believe, will be considered the most violent, gorey set of films in all the history of Hollywood. He leaves John Wayne and Clint Eastwood far behind–mere dilettantes.

The missionary lass, Sarah, is full of good intentions. However, her person is viewed as desirable, and the film leads one to believe that the warlord is just waiting for the perfect moment of lust and violence before descending upon the hapless lass, when suddenly Stalone reveals through his film that the warlord suffers from “misdirected libido.” Well, this isn’t so surprising as the whole film is “no-nonsense” good/evil. Things are clear-cut. There is no mistaking the good guys from the bad guys.

As for the appearance of Rambo, he doesn’t look too terribly. He is a bit bulky and jowly. There is a tendency for his lower lip to “hang,” and, since it appears to naturally jut out further than the upper lip, it sometimes is oddly noticeable. Perhaps the most surprising thing in this movie is that Stalone can still run well. He is seen even leaping over logs, which he does  admirably. Since I don’t believe that “body doubles” or stunt men were used for most of his running scenes, I can report that he is now a better athlete than the younger Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. Way to go, old man! You inspire old geezers everywhere.

All rights reseved. Gobigfoot, 2008.